" ...You´re better then the best
I´m lucky just to linger in your light
You make me smile like the sun
Oh, you make me smile
Oh, you make me smile
Oh, you make me smile... "
HE smiles that UNCLE KRACKER smile....
A year. That's my comma-phase from writing. Clearing that attic of all biases was necessary.
Some moments I can visualize Sam Uncle, as though we were in the same room, smiling his mega-watt smile and teasing "Aish..". A person's so real one day, and a distant memory the second day.
We lost him. Yes. And that's the depth of it.
Loss comes with so many realizations. It took me a while to grasp, but I am finally piecing them together. I don't want to get too maudlin. I couldn't. Because, that smile inspires so many brilliant sun-rays, it's tough not to smile back.
He loved life and all in it with a passion: he loved his sweet-heart feverishly, his family with reverence, his friends loyally, his colleagues un-grudgingly. And he has imprinted that part of him in that silent determination, that is, his loving daughter, my dearest friend and sister- Manita.
I couldn't come close to feeling the pain and loss she went though. I can't pick out all the thoughts, all my reflections that I have had over the year, a muddled yarn. But, I have had my moments, where I have found clarity, an understanding which has eased me, calmed me of smaller storms within. I had so many questions, but with his final fight he taught me the most important lesson of all- One life, and fight to Live it. Jut fight, dammit! It's your duty to live it well.
It's not easy, agreed. And the Truth we all try to hide behind is, our one constant and inevitable LONELINESS. It really is a fact. We all are, beneath it all, truly utterly alone; when we live, when we die. So what makes us? Our memories. We need to build and make memories. Don't love someone else, for them. Love them for yourself. It's a feeling that will comfort you, crack that grin on your face when you are on your death-bed. Travel. Make mistakes. Be foolish. Be stupid. Get hungry for more. Never settle. You will need all of that to hold on to, when you are making your move in the end. How peacefully you die is how lovingly you remember life.
I am a devout believer of never regretting something; because at some point it is exactly what you needed. I embrace pain easily as a part of what makes me stronger. That scar reminds me where I have been. Hell, I need some drama and tragedy- so much so that I create it sometimes.
And if it is so difficult to make your living worthwhile, then live it for the fear of death. It's not a finality, but a conclusion, a summary, and wouldn't you rather have a good one?
This is what I have learnt. I wake up to the challenge of each day; restless to cram so many different things, eager to learn, observe life. I pray.
And I am not saying I get it right all the time. I struggle but then I get my bearings about. It always feels uncomfortable and strange to be knocked out of your comfort zone. Then I hope and feel a bit exhilarated too.
HE reminds me.
I wanted to write him an ode but I think he is remembered well, when we mirror his attitude towards life. We'd rather remember him fondly, by seizing the day!
He is scored in our hearts forever, but for a closer look, I turn to you Sonu...
There are people deprived of a life of fearlessness; but you have lived boldly every day. Introduce yourself everyday to who you are, as Uncle is loved and cherished, for it, and you are a piece of him.
SAM UNCLE
I´m lucky just to linger in your light
You make me smile like the sun
Oh, you make me smile
Oh, you make me smile
Oh, you make me smile... "
HE smiles that UNCLE KRACKER smile....
A year. That's my comma-phase from writing. Clearing that attic of all biases was necessary.
Some moments I can visualize Sam Uncle, as though we were in the same room, smiling his mega-watt smile and teasing "Aish..". A person's so real one day, and a distant memory the second day.
We lost him. Yes. And that's the depth of it.
Loss comes with so many realizations. It took me a while to grasp, but I am finally piecing them together. I don't want to get too maudlin. I couldn't. Because, that smile inspires so many brilliant sun-rays, it's tough not to smile back.
He loved life and all in it with a passion: he loved his sweet-heart feverishly, his family with reverence, his friends loyally, his colleagues un-grudgingly. And he has imprinted that part of him in that silent determination, that is, his loving daughter, my dearest friend and sister- Manita.
I couldn't come close to feeling the pain and loss she went though. I can't pick out all the thoughts, all my reflections that I have had over the year, a muddled yarn. But, I have had my moments, where I have found clarity, an understanding which has eased me, calmed me of smaller storms within. I had so many questions, but with his final fight he taught me the most important lesson of all- One life, and fight to Live it. Jut fight, dammit! It's your duty to live it well.
It's not easy, agreed. And the Truth we all try to hide behind is, our one constant and inevitable LONELINESS. It really is a fact. We all are, beneath it all, truly utterly alone; when we live, when we die. So what makes us? Our memories. We need to build and make memories. Don't love someone else, for them. Love them for yourself. It's a feeling that will comfort you, crack that grin on your face when you are on your death-bed. Travel. Make mistakes. Be foolish. Be stupid. Get hungry for more. Never settle. You will need all of that to hold on to, when you are making your move in the end. How peacefully you die is how lovingly you remember life.
I am a devout believer of never regretting something; because at some point it is exactly what you needed. I embrace pain easily as a part of what makes me stronger. That scar reminds me where I have been. Hell, I need some drama and tragedy- so much so that I create it sometimes.
And if it is so difficult to make your living worthwhile, then live it for the fear of death. It's not a finality, but a conclusion, a summary, and wouldn't you rather have a good one?
This is what I have learnt. I wake up to the challenge of each day; restless to cram so many different things, eager to learn, observe life. I pray.
And I am not saying I get it right all the time. I struggle but then I get my bearings about. It always feels uncomfortable and strange to be knocked out of your comfort zone. Then I hope and feel a bit exhilarated too.
HE reminds me.
I wanted to write him an ode but I think he is remembered well, when we mirror his attitude towards life. We'd rather remember him fondly, by seizing the day!
He is scored in our hearts forever, but for a closer look, I turn to you Sonu...
There are people deprived of a life of fearlessness; but you have lived boldly every day. Introduce yourself everyday to who you are, as Uncle is loved and cherished, for it, and you are a piece of him.
SAM UNCLE
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